Metamodern masculinity

and it´s relation to will - for you 15 year-olds out there

Ok, I used the term ‘metamodern’ in the title. This is simply to get your attention. I don’t know what Metamodernity is, and neither do you. Probably something after Postmodernity, but nobody knows in what sense. (Also, this ‘after’ stands in question, since every ‘after’ is a modern metaphysical presupposition, and you know, all Grand Narratives are dead, right?) And don’t come to me with this ‘oscillation between irony and sincerity’ nonsense, because that was made up by G.F. Schlegel in the 18th century to describe modernity. (You got fooled by a translation error, if you want to get down that rabbit hole). But this misunderstanding is the very reason every metamodern theory sounds so incredibly mundane and banal. It’s because it still operates language-wise very much within the modern attractor basin. In other words: You can’t have a metamodern philosophy without a completely new language that accompanies it. And we ain’t there yet.

Anyway, I don’t want to talk about Metamodernity, but about masculinity. Maybe, by way of talking about the latter, I can illuminate the former a bit. I probably won’t say anything new here about both of these issues, except maybe to expressed intent to call for action.

As everybody probably knows, there has been a resurgence of the men’s movement over the past few years, concerned with the very question of masculinity. I am certainly not the first to notice that a good chunk of them seem incredibly feminine in their outlook—talking about integration of feeling, the anima, self-discovery, and performative self-expression (gimme my ax!). Which is fine, but which is also incredibly postmodern and psychological. As the great scholar Susanne Cook-Greuter once noted, the postmodern stage and its correlate stages of consciousness are about communion, while the integral, metamodern, or whatever stages are more about agency. And this is also the reason why performative ‘masculine’ guys like Aubrey Marcus are fundamentally so pussy-whipped: These Californian neo-hippies have no understanding of the real metaphysical phallus.

Which is another way of saying: You have to have the intellectual and emotional qualities and sensibilities, but ALSO the volitional. Remember Pestalozzi? Healthy development includes cognition (intellect), emotion (love), and volition (will). The reason why these men’s movements seem so incredibly feminized is because there hasn’t been a proper integration of the volitional aspect of development yet.

The five-dollar question—which is the reason you are still reading this—is: What is a metamodern masculinity, then? So let me indulge you.

There are two ingredients to metamodern masculinity—just two! It’s the proper self-referential handling of your outer and your inner frame. And again, the latter will be a bit harder to understand than the former.

Handling the outer frame in a self-referential manner means not kowtowing to society. Have your mission and act upon it. Don’t be fooled by the games, pressures, or temptations of society—like fear of money and poverty, fear of defamation, or the allure of entertainment in the form of culture wars. Don’t argue, don’t try to persuade. Instead, find what moves you, and do it. If that means sacrificing everything else, then so be it. It’s very simple. Don’t play the games that everybody is playing. Set your own rules. You’ve heard this a thousand times. Here once more: be informed, use the best philosophies, psychologies, and stories at hand. Be honest, congruent, and authentic in what you really want. Then act upon it as if you are in a war. Because you are. Period.

The second ingredient is way harder to understand, and even harder to act upon. Don’t lose your inner frame. Instead, treat this inner frame in self-referential manner. That means don’t kowtow to women (I am speaking to you hetero guys here), and more importantly, don’t kowtow or plead to God - or whatever substitutes your - or acts as your - ‘god’. You can talk to God, you can make deals, you can perform the proper rituals. But you don’t bow down to God. Don’t go down on your knee, don’t make empty sacrifices. You don’t hope, and you don’t plead. You don’t argue, and you don’t hope for salvation or grace. You don’t offer anything on an empty promise. You may force His or Her hand once in a while (depending on whom you are dealing with), but know that gods need you as much as you need them. So let it be with this incredibly stupid and archaic Christian and Buddhist adoration. Don’t be a wimp. In the rare instance that you have to ask, then do it like a man, and it will be given.

And the same is certainly true regarding women. Don’t appease them, don’t try to fit into their world, don’t argue. Don´t fear loneliness, and don´t be motivated by your fear of loneliness. Have your rules under which they can enter your world. Or be alone. In any case, be graceful, even under pressure. Remember: World and women are archetypically the same thing. You can dance with both. But never submit.

So there you have it: Metamodern masculinity. Do with it what you will.

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Off topic announcement:

"Sex, Death & the Occult" - by Layman Pascal - IS OUT NOW!

Book Launch today 7 PM CET. Get access to the Zoom event here:

https://www.parallax-media.com/books/sexdeathoccult

It is part textbook, part transcription of an online course, & part poetic grimoire. A grimoire is a fancy term for a collection of magical practices and ideas. Do you believe in magic? Does anyone really believe or disbelieve in magic? Maybe it is more about a kind of feeling. A special flavor of attention, energy and embodiment. A collection of interests in symbolism, manifestation, intention, ritual, ancient wisdom and the emancipatory vibe of all things wondrous.

Religion/Spirituality, ISBN 9791399025316, 347 Pages, 13 x 20 cm, Paperback. €19,90 Release date: June 21st